InnerThought

Some people say when they need to make a choice a devil appears on one shoulder and the angel on the other, to guide them in making the choice. Each representative pleads their case and then the choice can be made. I wish I was so lucky. Oh I have an angel and a devil come to me when I have a critical moral decision to make, but they don’t counsel me or even plead their case. They use my dilemma as an ability to come out of the ether and wage a religious war with my shoulders and head as the battle ground. In fact the reason I have an ear piercing in my left ear is because the devil missed when he used his trident as a javelin.

The war begins when they are summoned to help me chose, and a cease fire is called when I make up my mind and they are no longer “needed”. As you can imagine, I avoid making choices that have moral ramifications. But just the other day I was faced with a particularly hard question and I really didn’t know what to do and I couldn’t avoid it. Just as I paused to ponder question the devil appeared and began explaining the reasons why I should choose his way. After he enumerated the many logical reasons I realized that he wasn’t fighting, and he was alone! I stopped in my tracks and slowly turned my head towards him.

“Where is the angel?” I asked with suspicion in my voice.

“In Heaven” replied the devil in a sarcastic tone, then he spit on my shoulder.

“Umm… You just spat on my shoulder. I hope you are going to clean that up.” The devil just grinned at me defiantly and shook his head. “Anyway, what do you mean he is in Heaven? You two battle it out every time I have a question, did he not get the memo?”

“When I say he is in Heaven, I mean he is in his final resting place,” stated the devil with a tone of a man talking to a small child.

“You KILLED the angel!?!?!” I was stunned. I mean they got into some pretty good fights, but neither of them looked like they really got hurt.

“No, I didn’t kill him,” retorted the devil, “we are immortal! That means we can’t die. I slipped a sleeping pill into his holy wine… Okay, I slipped several sleeping pills into his wine. I figure he’ll be asleep for quite some time.”

Hearing that my angel guide wasn’t dead made me feel much better, then I quietly gave my devil a high five for such an awesome prank. And since my angel has been vacant life has become so much easier! I have a question, my devil appears, explains his side, which is all very logical, and then I go with him, and no more battles on my shoulder. Problem solved.